In honour of my sister

I’ve always been fascinated with photographs, I used to love to look at family pictures. I could stare for hours, especially as kid. I remember walking up the stairs of my two story house and getting lost in the pictures on the wall while I ascended the stairs. There were pictures of this baby girl and she stood out so much because she had the biggest smile on her face in all her pictures. I learned she was my older sister who passed away right before I was born, “she’s in heaven now” my mom would always say. As I got older my curiosity grew about her, her name was Selina Adene Hodgkinson and she was born with Down Syndrome. My parents tried to explain it in simple terms for me “She had holes in her heart and her lungs collapsed”, The gravity of the situation never hit me till I was older. She had died from complications of open heart surgery at 14 months, while at B.C. Children’s hospital. The grief of going through the death of a child is unimaginable to me, my mom has told me on numerous occasions that I had saved her life. Stricken with immense grief from the loss of her child and loss of her brother all with in just months of each other she had lost the will to live. She then found out she was pregnant with me, and that gave her a reason to continue on.  I always knew I wanted to do something in her memory for my parents, I had thought of starting a charity for kids with Down Syndrome and that I would use professional lacrosse as my avenue to do so. I was never quite established enough as a player to get that off the ground, but the goal of doing something in her memory had never died.

So one day I get a call from a former teammate Bobby Debrone, now I knew Bob worked for the Special Olympics but I thought he was just calling me for workout advice or something.  When he asked me if I wanted to volunteer with the Special Olympics and be the head power-lifting coach I didn’t think twice.  It was a no brainer for me, this was going to be my way of honouring my sister.  So the wheels were in motion and I came to Deanna and Sandy and asked if they would be willing to donate the space, they looked at it as a no brainer too.

I was unaware that the Special Olympics was a year round program that helped introduce people with special needs to all different kinds of sport, they wanted to bring powerlifting to Victoria because there was a big interest in it.  It is a 12 week trial and they wanted to see how it would go and if it was something they wanted to continue to offer.

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Photo Credit – Charla Huber – Goldstream News Gazette

So the day I really knew this whole thing was meant to be was when I found out that the three young men I’d be working with have Downs, it made me even more excited to meet Scott, Neil (The brothers) and Kyle (Who lives with Scott and Neil). Our first meeting was great, we shared a few laughs and showed off our biceps.  Kyle who is 23 was so excited about the whole thing he dropped down and started banging out pushups. Caroline who is Scott and Neil’s mother and caregiver to Kyle, informed me that Neil wouldn’t be participating because he was just diagnosed with clinical depression and hadn’t been eating much and lost weight.  So the next week we started our first session and it was pretty successful, I soon found out Kyle was a natural with the deadlift and Scott was eager to learn, Neil was quiet and stood off on the sidelines and watched.  We’ve made huge progress since that first day, form has improved and the boys have been adding more and more weight.  Neil is even starting to participate, his whole demeanor has changed and he’s starting to come out of his shell.  Neil is laughing and talking just as much as the other boys now and he’s even started eating more, I can see something has changed in his eyes, is it from the power-lifting? I’m not sure, but I really hope that it has something to do with it.

The one thing I found inaccurate from the article that “Goldstream Gazette” put out was how the boys were tentative about lifting.  The boys were always super eager to lift, they’ve never complained once.  Just like the weight, our bond has increased too!  The guys all have a great sense of humour and we laugh and have a lot of fun in the process.  I’d like to continue our friendship even after this awesome experience is over.  Even if we never end up in a single competition I hope this will give the boys more confidence in life and have an impact on them, I hope lifting can do for them what it’s done for my life.

~ Coach Ray

Please check out the article posted in the Goldstream Gazette –

http://www.vicnews.com/neighbourhoods/west_shore/205407831.html

IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT: We are creating “Zone Crew” shirts again this year to sponsor our athletes to get to Regionals.  They will be sold for $20 donation (minimum) for the team.  I was just informed that we need to get sizes and numbers in Tuesday am so they are ordered in time for printing.  We will be getting unisex sized American Apparel shirts.  If you know you would like to get a t-shirt to sponsor the team (even if you are unable to make it to Regionals), please email admin@crossfitzone.ca your size.  Sorry for the late notice!

Open Gym (downtown)

  • 9:30am – 10:30am
  • 1:15pm – 4:30pm

9 thoughts on “In honour of my sister”

  1. Thanks for sharing that story with us, Ray. If the guys ever need a cheering section or a bit of encouragement let us know.

  2. You are a great guy Ray. And it is wonderful that you care so much about your sister that you never met and that you carry her memory on in your life today. You are a magnificent role model for us all.

  3. Thank you so much for sharing this story. I have such a lump in my throat and I almost started bawling. I might still. I knew your little big sister, and your mom, through this time. You really did give her the strength to get through such a heartbreaking experience. What a wonderful tribute to both of them that you are so generously helping others in your sisters’ honour. Well done.

  4. Caroline Mavridis

    Ray I am glad all three of my guys are enjoying the power lifting and building not only muscle and skill but pride and confident in themselves because of your coaching and patients. As a family we are honored you care so much to give back to a person with Down syndrome in honor of your sister. You are one great coach and a wonderful brother.
    Thank you so much for jumping in and volunteering your time to help my family succeed in a sport they love. Mom to Neil and Scott and Caregiver to Kyle

  5. Ray, This is a wonderful story and a great way to catch up with how you are these days.
    I am a friend of your Moms. You may remember bringing the 2 kittens to our house to live- you had unusual names for them? and then you came back to visit again when they were several months older. you were about 8 or so at the time.
    I am reminded that an old friend of mine Rick Scott, a musician who has a down child in his family, wrote a wonderful song and has done some terrific work bringing down children into the limelight. The song is called “The Upside of Down” check out http://www.rickscott.com
    Thanks for your work on this. Leith

  6. Ray,
    I am so blown away impressed!! Caroline is an acquantice, and I know her twins. I have never met the young man that lives with them, but am so impressed with her family!
    It made me smile/cry to see the pics and article in the Goldstream Gazette.
    Judith Maffia works with my Nick with DS who is now 30. He was a poster child for DS until he was 25 and fell into a deep depression . Partially from previous abuses and the passing of his young grandma etc.
    Judith has taken him to Crossfit on her own to workout, and he thrives exercising. Psychiatrists insist on drugs, which we continue to resist, as I have seen him go sky high working out and bike riding. I literally pray that your program would be accepted by Special Olympics. I know , for a fact that exercise is the natural “drug`
    Thank you for sharing your personal story of what motivates you, through your deceased sister. Thank you for what you are doing now as a volunteer!!
    Blessings, Debbie Tuit

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